Be Humble and Kind; but most of all… BE HAPPY!

 

HAPPINESS ROCKS!

When you think about “happiness” … you may  think of the future in some way. The dream vacation coming up, the promotion you are working towards at work, the baby that is on the way, or the sixth date with someone new in your life. ( Thank goodness, I’m beyond that point!)

But happiness can also be found in the small things of a regular day.

So, today, look for it. Take just a few minutes and apply one of the ideas below and see how it brightens your day.  I’m thinking it just might.
One minute of appreciation

Take a minute, sit down and just reflect on what you appreciate and love about your partner, or a friend… or even… a family member!  This will fill you with gratitude and redirect your focus to the positive of things.

 Express your appreciation

Tell that partner, family member, or friend what you came up with. It will brighten his or her day. As his or her face lights up with a big smile ( you can also see it through a phone call) … you’ll feel happier too because emotions are contagious. (I’ve caught it once or twice myself!)

 Take a few minutes to see how you can help someone out

Offer some practical help, some good advice, look something up for them, be encouraging and supportive,  or just lend an ear.

Slow down

Walk and move slower for just a few minutes. Let your thoughts slow down. Use the minutes to enjoy what is happening all around you. Truly take it in with all your senses. There is so much simple wonder missed each day because we are preoccupied with our thoughts and plans for the future. Live in the now!

 Be the smile you want to see in your world 

Smile more towards the people you meet and you’ll get more smiles back. You’ll feel better. They will too. Actually, it’s contagious and they will probably smile more towards the other people they meet that day. So, don’t wait for other people to smile at you… be the smile you want to see in your world instead.

 Make someone else happy

Don’t stop at just smiles, give someone a big hug. Give him or her a small gift of some kind. Ask them their name! Cook their favorite food if they have had a bad day.
Actually, you can start your own day with setting a low bar for happiness. Now, that’s a good thought.

As you open your eyes and wake up to a new day tell yourself: Today, I will have a low bar for happiness!”

I have been using this one for quite some time now and it makes the ordinary day… well, just happier. I take fewer things for granted: my food, the weather, my life… and often pause to appreciate them more.

 Be the day you want to see

Don’t wait for someone else to create the day you want to have. Instead, get the ball rolling yourself. Take action and take the first steps forward. Many of us are now wearing “Fit Bits” or similar to measure the day’s activities.  Imagine that you are the “creator” of the day you want to experience in mood, accomplishments, and happiness!  You are.
 Say “Yes” to something new

Maybe try something you haven’t eaten before. Listen to a new song or album. Experience a new author or movie. Go see a new sport.  You get the idea. By actively going outside of what is normal for you or your comfort zone you’ll discover new, wonderful things in life quite often.

Get rid of your “should have” thoughts

The should haves in life can really drag happiness and energy down and make everything feel like heavy work. Do  you really have to do all of those shoulds on your “to-do” list? Or are you maybe stuck in a rut and are doing some of those things just out of habit?

Ask yourself one of my favorite questions: Will this matter in five years? Or even five months?

By zooming out like this you make it easier to see the true value of doing something. You see it for what it really is. Your questioning makes it easier to simply relax and say no to doing something because you realize that it isn’t that important  Do what you deep down believe is the “right thing.”

Instead of letting quick and judgmental words come of your mouth, be understanding.

Instead of snacking on some candy eat a fruit or drink a glass of water. Hard, right?

When an impulse inside of you wants you do something that you know deep down isn’t right for you then pause, be still for a few moments. The impulse will pass and you can  easily choose to take the action you know is right in this situation.

Then appreciate that you did the right thing, give yourself a pat on the back, and see how good it all feels. Continue to do this and you’ll help yourself to build stronger self-esteem.

Enjoy your life, enjoy your day!  Be Happy!

DOES LIFE EVER GET TO BE TOO MUCH?

via DOES LIFE EVER GET TO BE TOO MUCH?

DOES LIFE EVER GET TO BE TOO MUCH?

POSITIVE QUOTES have a way of being easy to digest and feel good about, but hard to practice and act on in real life.  Nonetheless, you can find wisdom in them and if applied can be used to transform your life.

I’m supposed to love what happens to me at all times?

What Nietzsche is trying to get across is the idea that there’s only one variable you’re able to control in your life — even though it often feels like you can’t — your attitude.

I hate to break it to you, but you aren’t special. You’re not the only one of us who has bad days, deals with tough situations or has to endure the collision that human relationships can become.

Not only is your situation common among people living today, but as humans, we’ve been dealing with the same issues since the beginning of human history.

People who lived thousands of years ago were cheated on by their spouses, had money problems, wanted to ascend in life, and felt stuck, lost or frustrated.

The awfulness of life is an inescapable truth that ties together people from all walks of life.

The remedy for what ails us all is the same, too. As best you can learn to find the gems of wisdom buried beneath the trials of life.

Easier said than done though, right?

Ego is the Enemy

Whenever we frame our problems as things being done to us, we fall prey to the trap our ego has set for us.

Your ego tells you your life is supposed to be better than it is right now.

It tells you your spouse was wrong and that they should apologize.

It tells you your boss is a jerk and the world is conspiring to keep your salary and your sanity as low as possible.

Your ego doesn’t want you to love what happens to you because when you learn to love what happens to you it’s harder to rationalize your situation.

See, there’s always something you can glean from every situation.

In the book, Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl, he discusses how he was able to find meaning during a set of circumstances to trying for most to even live through; being in a concentration camp.

If he was able to find meaning in a situation like that, surely we can learn to love the things that happen to us as they likely pale in comparison.

I get it. It’s not easy to do at the moment. When you’re sad, pissed, holding a grudge, frustrated, vengeful, prideful, or any mix of the destructive emotions that tend to come with the everyday grind, it’s hard at your situation and accept that it could be playing a positive role in your life.

But your life can be a teacher, even if you don’t want to learn the lessons it gives you in the moment. Even pain can be a signal to act.

It all depends on the way you see what happens to you.

The Most Powerful Tool We Can Use to Deal With Problems

Each time you face a problem you go through the same familiar cycle of feelings and behaviors.

You don’t want to accept what’s happening. You run through the alternative scenarios of what could’ve or should’ve happened.

At this point, you’re so deep in the woods you can’t see the entire forest. It’s often at this low point where you have the most power. On the other hand, it can also be the final nail in the coffin — leaving your attitude cemented in a bedrock of disappointment.

How to some people rise above circumstances ranging from frustrating to dismal?

I can’t speak to their exact thoughts, but I’m guessing they use the two-punch combination I employ when I’m at my lowest.

First, accept what’s happening fully. You can’t rewrite what has already happened. One of the hardest things to do is start where you are. If you’re able to ground yourself in the present moment, however, you can move to the next step in the process.

After you’ve accepted your situation, you can seek to change your perception of it. In Frankl’s case, he had no escape from his situation, but he chose to perceive his situation using the lens of deeper meaning he could find in it, instead of focusing on the tragic nature of it.

What are you going through right now?

Can you change the way you’re perceiving the situation?

Try shifting your perception “something is being done to me” to “I can do something about this.”

The Question that Opens Doors of Opportunity in Your Life

The only mistakes that do true harm are the ones you fail to learn from and repeat again, which will happen from time to time.

If, however, you’re able to reflect long enough to answer this question, you might be able to move forward with an improved perspective.

The question is, what can I learn from this?

Let’s say your employer fires you — a truly down moment in your life. What can you learn from that experience?

Maybe you’ll learn the position didn’t suit you. It didn’t align with your strengths, which made your termination inevitable.

Maybe it was a blessing you got fired because now you can spend time figuring out where your talents lie instead of wasting years of your life doing something you weren’t supposed to do in the first place.

Or let’s say you’ve been in a particularly nasty fight with your significant other.

Maybe you’ll learn to express your feelings before you reach a boiling point.

Maybe you’ll learn to keep your eyes open, be present, and pay attention to your relationship, else something you failed to notice will blindside you.

I know these are only words. In the moment, it will be difficult to think about what you can learn from a situation when you’re seeing red, feel down, and trapped in a prison of circumstance.

That’s the point, though. Love isn’t easy.

Especially when it comes to loving your situation. When it comes to your life, “til death to us part” is a vow you can’t break.

The Power We All Have Inside Us

Learning to love your life starts with learning to love yourself.

How do you love yourself? By displaying character in life’s hardest moments.

“When jarred, unavoidably, by circumstance revert at once to yourself and don’t lose the rhythm more than you can help. You’ll have a better grasp of harmony if you keep going back to it.” — Marcus Aurelius

The roman emperor wasn’t telling us to “shake things off” the second they occur, but rather to fall back on your character and realize you have the power to be good even when life isn’t good to you.

If people mistreat you, you can find peace in being the bigger person.

If life throws you a curveball, you can rest in the knowledge that you don’t have to allow it to change your character.

Some of the world’s most inspiring people faced challenges greater than you and I will ever face. What inspires us most is the character they displayed during those circumstances.

Martin Luther King never let hatred turn his heart into stone when he had every right to have a hardened heart.

Frankl should have become a cynic, but instead developed a core of meaning most of us will never have.

If these great people can keep their values intact during the most trying times, surely we can remain positive people with integrity during our own trials.

Still, everything I’ve mentioned so far pales in comparison to the main reason you should love your life regardless of what happens to you.

THIS 4TH OF JULY… FIND INDEPENDENCE FOR YOURSELF!

This is interesting to think about. While we can’t change the past or predict our future, we can change the present life we are living. We have the choice, every single day, to do what we’re doing and just how we do it. I would love to say that I’m going to “edit” all of the negativity out of my life, once and for all… and live happily ever after for ever. Of course, it’s not that easy. There are real life issues when it comes to living the present. Personal issues, family issues, health issues and… well, life itself crowds the every day agenda. If we could all just do what we wanted to do every day, it would be nice, but that’s not realistic either.

This brings us to a logical question: What can you take out of your present situation to make life more of what you want it to be? Believe it or not, there are even little things you can change to make your world more of what you want it to be. Too often we settle for things as they are, assuming that is how they have to be. They don’t. You have the God-given ability to “cut things out” : negative people, bad places, unhealthy activities and habits, and whatever it takes in order to improve your current Life’s Story.Just as when I’m editing the written word, it’s not easy to cut things out, but it can be accomplished.

This is what we need to do in real life too … edit. When you’re writing your life, you can’t have everything in the story or it gets cluttered and chaotic. What’s important to you? Not what’s important to the people around you, but to you! Give your own story strength of character and integrity of personal choices. You can’t control what others do, but you can control your own actions to the stimulus!

The past may be gone and the future might be uncertain, but we have the power to choose our ” now.”  FINALLY, INDEPENDENCE FOR ALL!